Some of you who follow me closely might be smart enough to point out that I do not live my life by social norms. I have this real useless thing I do called ‘thinking,’ and because of that I often like to form an opinion about things once in a while, especially when stupidity is involved. And a very reliable source (consisting of a group of morons who hate the concept of joy and freedom) notified me that because of this I am not a very good Bhutanese citizen.
Please read along as I enter the forbidden land of Bhutanese hypocrisy to piss off another group of people.
As many of you know, I make my living from the Film Industry. And as such, we have to live very much under the dictates of BICMA, an authority often referred to as ‘real life autocorrect’ by some.
Recently, in their quest to censor everything good from Bhutanese media, they have once again jumped in with their rod of chastening to censor kissing scenes from Bhutanese movies. (I didn’t know this was a thing until one of the films I was associated with was denied certificate unless they cut out the kissing scene.) Before I further my case, let me remind my audience that the scenes weren’t unshowable.
When asked to justify, their answer was that we have always been a conservative society and such are shameful, indecent and against our culture.
Now those of you who think a kissing scene in a film is obscene and against our culture, do you even know our culture? Do you know how salacious our traditions can be at times?
You can’t even enter a Bhutanese village with your family members because every possible place is filled with penises and phalluses. Penises protruding out of the door posts, penises hanging down from the roof. There are large wall paintings of penis fastened with silk ribbon, and for some reason strangled by a dragon. And people even wear miniature phalluses for a necklace as a sign of good luck.
There is the festival of naked dance where nude men flap their junk against their thighs, and the rest of the women watch them and clap.
And there is the widely celebrated tradition of night hunting, a culture that encourages non-consensual sex, rape, and teenage pregnancy.
And not to mention the tradition of Serga-Mathang, a glorified excuse to screw one’s cousins.
Go to any Tshechus and try coming back without being dry-humped from the back by some mannerless Atsaras.
Bhutanese worship Lam Drukpa Kuenley whose very philosophy of preaching Dharma was through (brace yourself ladies) the blessings of his gigantic johnson.
It is penises, sex, penises, and more penises; that is our whole culture. And you are telling me that we were culturally very conservative and shy society? Then you either don’t know our culture at all, or you are blind.
What makes our culture? The music, the literature, the paintings, the costumes. And what are they? Art. And art and culture are evolving every day. Culturally, we never wore underwears; now we do. (Although there are rumours that some senior officials at the Driglam Namzha commission still do not wear underwear in order to uphold our tradition of no-underwear.) We used to cook our food in a bamboo trunk; now we have rice cookers. My point is, things evolve for betterment without necessarily changing our identity.
I do appreciate your efforts to promote our national language and national dress; you keep an eye that our culture is upheld properly. And these are good things you do, but there are those things you do that do not make any sense in today’s modern society. We are already exposed to such things through televisions and western medias.
The change is flowing in like a flood. Globalization is inevitable. You can either move with the flow or get washed by it; either way, despite your approval, change is here to stay for good.